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Post by everloving11 on Aug 31, 2016 20:46:26 GMT
No matter what decision each of us makes at this point of the estrangement, it takes courage to follow through. As I looked over the members we have here so far, I am impressed that it was no easy task for each of us to find this site. We were each diligent in our efforts because we really are good parents who are bewildered by our children who chose to turn away from us - and primarily from God.
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Post by everloving11 on Aug 31, 2016 20:50:59 GMT
I just realized that you get more posting options by hitting "reply" instead of "quick reply" ---- good to know. Oh, but if you put a smiley in after you type out your reply, it deletes the rest of your reply. Very interesting!
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Post by autumnwind on Aug 31, 2016 21:04:40 GMT
thank you everloving11, we are good parents. I know it is satan that tries to convince otherwise. You are right, if we didn't care, we would not bother with this site.
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Post by lindajoan on Aug 31, 2016 21:29:03 GMT
Yes hitting 'reply to topic' is best.
I agree with the Prodigal son parable. So does my DH. I also agree that if our EC do not come to the Lord first then any reconciliation would not be permanent.
We can not change our EC. Only God can but we can pray. Every journey is different. As we pray, God and His Word will guide us.
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Post by JeepGirl on Sept 1, 2016 4:55:44 GMT
Unfortunately, I have been in estrangement for many years. However, these years have taught me so much. I used to wonder what to do....should I continue trying to contact them while only meeting up with disrespect and anger, and being told over and over to leave them alone?
All I can say, is what was said to me by a dear friend who was estranged from her son for years (and is now reconciled)...."You will come to a point when you finally realize it is time to give it over to God and leave it with Him, until or if your estranged child returns on his own accord." Until you come to that point, and it usually takes an honest look at everything and/or another major rejection, you will continue to wonder what to do and justify your actions. The truth is when our children say to leave them alone, we have to respect what they are asking in spite of our love for them and our desire for reconciliation. We simply have to Stop. Stop and realize we can do no more. At that point, placing it all in God's hands will result in a much needed release.
I pray that point comes quickly for you, as well as the bittersweet peace you will finally receive, knowing you have to leave it alone and truly give it over to God. We each arrive at the point in our own time. Prayers for you, my sister, and God's guidance.
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Post by autumnwind on Sept 1, 2016 10:43:55 GMT
Thank you JeepGirl. I have been on this road now, many years with my daughter and sil. She contacts me for a little while and then disconnects again. I guess it is the way she does it, so cruelly. I see pictures thru someone elses facebook of my granddaughter. I guess that keeps me somewhat connected and I want to see them. I need to stop that totally. I am in constant prayer about it. This situation does drive you closer to God, and thru this I have ministered to others. My heart still breaks though. Thank you for your prayers.
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Post by byhisgracealone on Sept 1, 2016 21:20:22 GMT
I understand autumn, I really do. I don't mention this often, but long ago, I was engaged to an abusive man. It lasted approx. one year. He did everything he could to isolate me from my family. I found ways to reach out to them whenever I had privacy, and eventually, they helped me leave him.
I guess that's why I've stopped questioning whether to reach out to my ED. I know I found a way to communicate with my family during that terrible time, and our EC's could reach out as well. They could buy a throw away cell that can't be detected. My daughter knows where I am, I haven't changed my phone number, and she knows I would be there if she reached out.
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Post by everloving11 on Sept 4, 2016 15:02:50 GMT
I 'hear' the cry of everyone's hearts - hard to believe that the ones we carried for 9 months and nurtured for a couple of decades could turn away from us. I take the curse in Genesis of "pain in childbearing" as pain in bearing up our children. I love each of our four children and wouldn't change their personalities at all ~ each is so differnet. But I have had lots of pain bearing them up - and am not about to stop now!!! Perhaps that's why God made us mothers the way He made us ~ we dispense that part of God's love, acceptance, and forgiveness for our children that He extends to us. It does hurt to love ~ and it is and will be worth it all.
I'll try to upload an image - we'll see if it works!
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