Dear Frienda, Can you believe it is that time of the year again. I can’t! We may be few in number these days but I want you too know I check in each day. What a special time of the year to remember that Jesus coming as a baby is because He wanted to seek and to savell of us from being lost. And He did! thank you for coming , Jesus.
Let’s all remember the reason for the season. I hope you all have a lovely Christmas. In spite of the hardacheane and sadness that this lost and dark world brings to us the one source of all help, strength joy, and peaceremains. His name is Jesus.
God bless each one and please let me know how I may support you and pray for you. I am thankful to be home from the hospital for Christmas. Christmas hugs to all, Linda joan
Merry Christmas to all. It's been quite a year: the best, the worst, and the most ridiculous. Yet, people are still people ~ what I mean to say is that God loves them as much as He loves us --- we can do no less. The gift we give ourselves is forgiveness ~ not only forgiving others but ourselves as well.
Yes, it is sad when our loved ones alter meaningful family traditions by their actions or anger. But we can still love, if only from afar. One of our family members has completely changed our realities so that we have to have three separate events - but, the blessing is, that we do get to see everyone - just not all together. And I get to hear from our ES at least 2-4 times a month. Last week we talked for 3 hours. Goodness, that's longer than I talk to any one person at a given time. What a Christmas gift!!! May each of you get to see a miracle played out in your lives this year ~ Linda Marie
I hope everyone had a blessed Christmas despite whatever distance there is between you and your EC. The longer my estrangement goes on, the more peace I have about "letting go and letting God." That's helped me to also focus less on making Christmas perfect for everyone; Christmas was made perfect at Jesus's birth, and the manger certainly wasn't clean and didn't have cookies fresh from the oven, and so much more. God is meeting me in my brokenness and sadness over what was and making my ways straight. How, I don't know (yet), but I know that He is making your ways straight as well. I know He is perfecting hearts and minds in us, and in our children. It's messy, dark and uncomfortable, but so was the birth of the Saviour!
I know that so many of you, like me, have busy, complicated lives, and even though I don't always catch up regularly here, I'm nevertheless extremely grateful for this place of warmth, acceptance, wisdom and prayer. May this next year be full of unparalleled faith for each of you. Lifting you up and grateful for each of you.
Hi my friends, Even though we are not on here as frequently these days, so comforting to see your posts.
With my reconciliation, it was truly a special Christmas. However, as Linda Marie and Luke said, it was different. Maybe that is what makes estrangement so difficult. We long for the traditions we created and had at one time but, as life goes on, we get older, our kids get older and grands get older and life just happens. But, in estrangement, we don't, and cannot, really appreciate that. We don't know what has happened in our kids' lives, we don't know what is happening now and we simply long for the past. I am thinking that many of us are from the Disney generation (where everyone lives happily ever after) and Norman Rockwell's perfect family holidays. They never really existed, except for maybe a few but, in time, life happens for everyone.
I say all of that because it is true. When reconciliation occurs, it will be different. I don't mean bad, just different and, actually, in some ways better. During our estrangements, most of us had a lot of time for reflection and have changed over the years. I tend to think for the better. And I am seeing that, at least in my case, my es and family have changed and I believe for the better. Maturity helps us all. lol
During my estrangement, I would be envious knowing my adult children and grands were all together at my ex's house on Christmas Eve. Since reconciliation, I discovered that it wasn't the Norman Rockwell Christmas there either but, in our minds, we believe it is. Cousins and siblings don't always get along. lol But, I also discovered this Christmas that having my children and grands at my house at separate times was actually better. And, what was the best gift for me this Christmas was when my formerly es and family invited us to go to a Christmas village with them and to then to dinner. Only you guys can appreciate how special that was. The way things were in the past are just not so important anymore. And those things I used to take for granted, have become more special than ever. My son gave us a Christmas card and just seeing the handwritten "Mom" at the top and "love" at the bottom...do I need to say more? Or the first hug I received from him in years. I see the world and holidays so differently now. Being estranged was the worst time of my life but God used it, taught me so much, changed my son and reconciled us when the time was right, even though it took ten years. And I am thinking that an earlier reconciliation probably would not have worked. I will post about that at another time, if anyone is interested.
I already wrote way more than I should have but love each of you so much, understand so clearly what you are feeling, even as you are going forward in your lives, and just wanted to share with each of you encouragement and hope. We all know God is faithful and He is and HE will "...restore the years the locust has eaten..." in His time. love and prayers...Joanna
DeRJeep,I am thankful that you posted what. Christmas miracle to have reconciliation with your son and family. I remember how you would tell us when you first saw the grandchildren and started inviting them over. The Lord used each thing to lead you closer to the gift of reconciliatio. His timing is always perfect. Although we may not see it that way at the time. God knows best!
I would love to hear from you often about the wisdom the Lord has given to you.
Oh Jeep Girl I understand the humongous blessings you have experienced this year. YES, YES, YES!!!! Your reconciliation is much further along than mine yet I am so happy for you. At this time last year, I never imagined I would be talking with my ES on the telephone for hours but here we are.
It reminds me of Jacob's response on hearing that his "dead" son Joseph wasn't dead after all and that his own sons sold him into servant-hood, etc. etc. And Jacob said, "It is enough; Joseph my son is yet alive: I will go and see him before I die." Genesis 45:28 Jacob determined that he couldn't fix the past lost years so he would enjoy the time he had left with the son he hadn't been with in decades.
Oh, Jeep Girl, enjoy these years that God has given you as your "new normal". God bless you. Linda Marie