Dr. Coleman

I know there are different opinions about Dr. Coleman, but I read this small, simple post by him today and thought I would share it.  Most of us know what he is saying is true, but sometimes need a reminder.  Also, I do not believe Dr. Coleman is a Christian so I would simply add to the bottom of this that our worth and value is in Jesus.

COMMON MYTHS ABOUT ESTRANGED PARENTS

There are a number of myths that are popular with estranged parents and about them. Below are some of the most common:

MYTH: If my child feels that negatively about me, they must be right

FACT: There are many reasons that children cut parents off other than parental mistakes: some common ones include:
  o the need for more autonomy or other aspects of identity
    o loyalty to your ex-husband or ex-wife
      o problems with a difficult DIL/SIL
        o psychological problems in the child

MYTH: My child is the most appropriate person to say what kind of a parent I am or was

FACT: Sometimes one's children are the least able because they're too close to see you with any objectivity

MYTH: I can't have a happy life without my child in it

FACT: The biggest obstacle isn't the absence of the child, it's your guilt, shame, and pull to punish yourself

MYTH: If my own child rejects me, it proves that I'm not lovable.

FACT: Your value shouldn't be given to your child or anyone else to determine. Your value is part of your birthright and you should guard it with your life.